8 rounds of poison...

**Wednesday 3rd December 2014**

So yesterday was my last chemo and I said to myself that I wouldn't post a "last chemo" picture as I remember seeing other women doing it and it made me sad that I had a long way to go...however it's flown by!!..

our "journey" (I actually hate that phrase)started back in April when we lost our baby,I was then diagnosed in June & they can't be sure if the pregnancy caused my Cancer or fuelled it to grow..who knows,all I know is that I swapped pregnancy for chemo & being able to have a family for Cancer, so having had 8 lots of chemo-starting on 1st July I'm now finished & awaiting my surgery date. 

I've had ulcers/vile vile vile mouth

nausea/ vomiting -this was taken after quite a "good day"

 constipation/ diarrhoea/piles/the mother of all tooth infections(pacing up and down the street at 3am was a particularly low point as was searching for pliers at 6am to pull my own tooth out)/bone pain/trapped nerve (made "better" by Arron assisting me up from the floor pulling at only 1 of my arms)/ tonsillitis/UTI/unbelievable tiredness/roid rage/neuropathy/lost practically every hair on my entire body (bloody leg hair started growing back though after FEC-typical!!)

chemo brain (empty plates in the fridge/wondering if you come up for air on the euro tunnel/butter in the sink /being amazed by the high streets xmas lights 3 nights running having forgotten that I'd seen them the previous night)massive Tax emotional tantrums (smashed plates in the sink/crying hysterically in Asda toilets)/painful nails/ sore Runny eyes /steroid

Moon face (see below pic)

*TMI* wet the bed twice!! Thankfully there are no pictures to record that...

I've had biopsies/ ultrasounds/ mammograms/CT and bone scans/MRI's..

I spent 3 nights in hospital from Neutropenic Sepsis -neutrophils being 0.1 (which then made me tell a few white lies to my mom and dad to get them on a plane to Tenerife..) 

Still managed to pack my animal print gear though...

Also chemo brain kicked in and I accidentally ordered the "soft" food option at dinner time -yummy....

 and I've cried more tears than I care to think about BUT I've also laughed more than I ever have, 

I'm more in love with Arron more than I ever thought possible, we'd often skip out of chemo laughing as the waiting room were obviously trying to guess which one of us had Cancer....

 i've spent loads of time with my family, I've become closer to people who I haven't seen for years, I've made some fabulous new friends-here I am with Sarah & Rebecca who I met through YBCN -this is us on our Cancer Xmas Do

For Sarah's blog click here:-

http://hbocuninformed.blogspot.co.uk

For Rebecca's blog click here:-

http://secretdiaryofachemogirl.blogspot.co.uk

I also met the wonderful people that are Simons Heros and got a gorgeous spa break at Hoar Cross 

 & I get to spend more time with the people I love,

 I still have a long way to go but just wanted to mark the occasion & try to reassure the women who are just starting out on the shit storm that is Breast Cancer -plus my niece (who's 18 months old & one of the little loves of my life) painted me a fabulous picture 

and wanted to share it!xx and here's to being #choppedUpIn2015