Monday, 22 June 2015


6 days ago my friend Rosie died. she's left an unbearable hole in my life, in our little gang, we miss her dearly.

The day I was diagnosed with bone mets, I told the girls, and instantly Rosie called me. she was the first person I spoke to, I will never forget our conversation, she understood, she told me that it was shit and she'd hoped that I would never have to join the secondaries group, but she also said that I'd probably had the worst news I was ever going to have and so at least that was out of the way, this may sound crazy but that was quite comforting. She also said that I should shout, cry, scream, drink a large Gin and Tonic (which I was already doing at that point) and then tomorrow I had to pull up my big girl pants and we would fight this together.

13 days ago we (me, Rebecca, Sarah, Andrea and Cinzia) went down to London to see her in hospital, it was a day of hope, a day of light, we laughed with Rosie, in fact we giggled like school girls, like we do all day and night on our chat, she gave me a massive hug, and even though she was very weak and tired she still asked about me, my treatment, my biopsies, she checked that the others were ok too, that was just Rosie, she was like a big sister. We planned future get to gethers and when we were getting ready to leave she insisted that we went straight to the pub and that she would be there the next time.

The next time we all met up was at Rosie's shiva. After we all went to the pub, Rosie, was with us,just as she said she would be the next time we met up, a white feather appeared at our table, infect it stuck itself to my champagne flute.

I hope, well I know youve upgraded to a room with a view and that you are indeed at the bar for happy hour, with Jojo.